Another piece of my Puzzle

I received a call from my dad tonight. I haven't heard from him and haven't called him in some time. E-mail is my main form of communication and he doesn't e-mail. Then again, if he did, I am not sure how much we would communicate. I have to admit that there are times e-mail communication would be much easier between me & him. Out of his 3 children, I am the only one who still speaks to him. So, as you can imagine, I am the one he finds out most things from - about the other two children. He always asks me how they are doing...I usually respond "as far as I know, all is well". I rarely talk to my sister (we used to e-mail or talk almost daily) and even less to my brother. It just isn't something we all do... Anyway, he asked me tonight how they all were, if Kyle's wife was still enjoying her job. He didn't know that she had changed jobs some time ago...I guess that never came up and I didn't tell him as I don't think about changes to everyone and what I should tell him. He also didn't know that my sister in law is pregnant. I didn't think he knew because I haven't received a phone call from him saying "Did you know J was pregnant? Why haven't you called to tell me?!" "I guess they just don't want me to be involved or to know this baby!" Well, as you can guess where this post is going, I was the bearer or good/bad news to him this evening. He called to check on us, ask about my recent trip to DC and other family issues. He was asking what all they were up to after finding out that she had changed her job and if Kyle was still at the same employer. I finally told him, look, you should know that J is pregnant. Silence...just silence..."what did you just say?" So, I repeated that she is pregnant, due in January and it is a little girl....Silence...Anyone notice the position I am in at this point? I have just dug the knife in deeper. Yes, there are so many things that I could bring up from my past. These might help you understand the veins and arteries that pump the life in and out of the feelings for him - from all 3 of us, but we don't have time. Even so, I am the one in the middle. I don't think either side - my siblings nor my dad - intend for this to be the case, but it just how things are. So, after commenting that he couldn't believe they didn't want him to know, didn't want him to be a part of this grandchild's life - through tears he told me that he had to get off of the phone. So, now I sit here on my couch in my den with a lamp on, the Christmas tree lights on, and my laptop. The hum of the heater and creaks in the house. These are the sounds I hear. I know that if I were sitting outside of his window right now, I would hear sobs of sadness and pain. No matter how much we can say he put himself in this position, it is sad to me to know that someone, anyone, is in this much pain and feels this kind of rejection. Again, thanks for letting me type this out. I have no idea if you have read it or not or will read it. But, I needed to put this on "paper".

I am so envious (yes, I know this is a sin) of those with normal families who are in the movies. You know the ones who get together and have a great time over the holidays and everyone looks like they love each other - if only for the photos - they still look like they do. Oh to have a normal family, whatever that is....